Thursday, December 9, 2004

Lessons My Mother Taught Me

 

Lessons My Mother Taught Me

My Mother taught me LOGIC...
"If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can't go to the store with me."

My Mother taught me MEDICINE...
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way."

My Mother taught me TO THINK AHEAD...
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job!"

My Mother taught me ESP...
"Put your sweater on; don't you think that I know when you're cold?"

My Mother taught me TO MEET A CHALLENGE...
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you...Don't talk back to me!"

My Mother taught me HUMOR...
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT...
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.

My mother taught me ABOUT SEX...
"How do you think you got here?"

My mother taught me about GENETICS...
"You are just like your father!"

My mother taught me about my ROOTS...
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"

My mother taught me about the WISDOM of AGE...
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION...
"Just wait until your father gets home."

My mother taught me about RECEIVING...
You are going to get it when we get home.

And my all time favorite thing- JUSTICE
"one day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU...then you'll see what it's like."

 

***** Hope you enjoyed the above wisdom only a mother can impart to a child. LOL.  I swear I will write something original one of these days. There are just so much distraction at the moment that I need to focus and write something noteworthy ( and journalworthy, of course).

*****I found the christmas decorations and I will decorate the house sometime this week. I have a TO DO list that is getting longer everyday and not a lot have been crossed out of it lately. 

*****Happy Holidays to one and all!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

yes TOOOOO much to do. washing my walls clean clean clean. That seems it s all I do. Lori

Anonymous said...

Cute! I know what you mean about the list though... seems everytime I mark something off I add two more <sigh> But this too (Christmas/winterHolidays) will pass <g>.
http://journals.aol.com/astaryth/AdventuresofanEclecticMind

Anonymous said...

This is really funny, and oh so true. I've heard at least half of these (from my mom of course!) and have learned valuable life lessons from them.
I like putting things that I find on the internet or some file on my comp. I never knew existed. Prolly cuz they're funnier or just better than stuff I'd write.
Happy Holidays!
-Haley-

Anonymous said...

I love that!!!!! Thanks for stopping by my journal, and for your kind words. I will be back here as well!!!
Jodi

Anonymous said...

All those "Momisms" we all swore we'd never use...  I think I've uttered them too.  Well at the time they sounded good...lol ~Sie  

Anonymous said...

LOL< these were great, thank you!

:-)
~JerseyGirl
http://journals.aol.com/cneinhorn/WonderGirl

Anonymous said...

If I hadn't read that line about "writing something original", I was going to tell my agent that I found the next Erma Bombeck on the aol journal thing.  Well, even though they aren't yours, it was most generous and kind of you to share them with us.  Great fun.  You are much too young to remember Molly Goldberg - a wonderful women philosopher out of the early days of telelvision when writing was the most important thing and the laughter wasn't canned.  Molly would have loved your "My mother taught me's" as much or more than me and the 19 people down below.  Thank you again.

Anonymous said...

If I hadn't read that line about "writing something original", I was going to tell my agent that I found the next Erma Bombeck on the aol journal thing.  Well, even though they aren't yours, it was most generous and kind of you to share them with us.  Great fun.  You are much too young to remember Molly Goldberg - a wonderful women philosopher out of the early days of telelvision when writing was the most important thing and the laughter wasn't canned.  Molly would have loved your "My mother taught me's" as much or more than me and the 19 people down below.  Thank you again.