Love is...

"Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal."

 

- C. S. Lewis, The Four Loves

 

 

              

 

Three Years Ago.

 

Me: Why do you push away those who love you the most?

Her: I do not know. 

 

A Week Ago

 

Me: He adores you. Why do you push him away?

Her: Because I am scared.

Me: Scared of what?

Her: Scared that I am not the person he thinks I am. Scared thatI will be a burden and a hindrance from achieving his goals, ambitions, and dreams. Scared that he will have to give up something he loves because of me. Scared that I could die young and leave him confused, angry, and lonely.  

Me: Have you discussed this with him? 

Her: No. I am scared to.    

 

 

"Advance, and never halt, for advancing is perfection. Advance and do not fear the thorns in the path, for they draw only corrupt blood."
-Kahlil Gibran

Happy Valentine's Day

                                       

Since you're away and I can't buy you your favorite flowers, here's the virtual equivalent of giving them to you today. Someday, I'll take you to Holland and buy you all the tulips you'll ever want in your lifetime!  

 

Happy Valentine's Day!

Hear Me Roar!

 

I am Woman

by: Helen Reddy (1972)  

 

 I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again

CHORUS
Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman

You can bend but never break me
'cause it only serves to make me
More determined to achieve my final goal
And I come back even stronger
Not a novice any longer
'cause you've deepened the conviction in my soul

CHORUS

I am woman watch me grow
See me standing toe to toe
As I spread my lovin' arms across the land
But I'm still an embryo
With a long long way to go
Until I make my brother understand

Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to I can face anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman
Oh, I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong

FADE
I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong
I am woman

 

 

The Secret?

.

I read the book, The Secret. It is touted as "life changing." 

I like the book so I also watched the movie. That was a waste of time because the movie is the book, verbatim. The only thing added in the movie is the visual.

There's no secret in The Secret. The book renamed Peale's and Carnegie's concept of Positive Thinking and called it Law of Attraction. It's a mind over matter theory. 

I found a short clip of the book's concept on YOU TUBE and I thought it is share worthy. Watch it and tell me what you think.  

 

 

VAYA CON DIOS

 

 

I have not been here in a while.

 

A phenomenon called LIFE took over my blogging time. I accomplished a great deal of things that are important to me during my disappearance and some are still in progress but I am not here to showcase my achievements. I am writing an entry because sleep is eluding me tonight.  

 

My once grounded existence had been shattered by my mother passing away. She passed away peacefully in her sleep last night.

 

I now feel like I am floating in a surreal world. I am not in touch with my feelings. I am in a cloud of numbness. I cry constantly but yet I can not grasp the emotion that precipitates these tearful spurts. I am supposed to be sad. I know how sad feels but I do not feel sad. I do not feel anything. I am perplexed by the tears streaming on my face. I have no control over them. My brain refuses to access the files where my mother's memories are stored. I have no focus. My head feels like it is stuffed with cotton. My mind does not want to operate to its full capacity. Something is very wrong with my brain chemistry.  

 

This is so new to me. I did not feel this confusion when my father and my older brother died.  With their passing, I was more accepting.  After I let a out a good cry, I was able to reach closure and enjoy the great memories I shared with them.

 

I am bone tired and weary. I want to sleep. I want to wake up tomorrow and feel like me again.

 

Somehow, I feel like I will never be the same again. I am puzzle with a piece gone forever.  

 

I am a babbling mess.

 

I do not want a pity party.  I am grasping every straw to keep my sanity intact right now. Writing this entry is a selfish endeavor. I am trying to do something that will help me sort out my situation.  Writing has a calming effect on me.  

 

Coherence is not my purpose here. I am merely aiming for mental clarity.  

Checking In

                                      Earth Angel

                         

I just bought the folk art painting above from a very talented artist named Angela. I love it because the subject reminds me of my daughter. My daughter has a big heart and always tries to save the world. I love the painting so much that I asked the artist to paint a similar one on a bigger canvas so I could give it to my daughter.

A lot of people do not like naive art because they are very simple and the artists who make them usually do not have professional/ academic art training. The creators of primitive art are most often self taught so they do not attain widespread popularity like professionally trained painters. Grandma Moses comes to mind when fame in folk art is mentioned but nobody else. Most folk artists only attain regional acclaim so not a lot of people from outside their regions knew who they were.

Some people call folk art "working class art." Some turn their noses upward on folk art collectors. Since it is not considered "fine art" or "high art" by most art collectors, some primitive art collectors hide their passion for it to save themselves from derision.

I am not afraid to admit that I love folk/naive/primitive art. I can appreciate art in various forms and styles. I have been in a lot of art museums in the United States and abroad.  I have been exposed to the work of the famed old and new masters. The reason why I like folk art is not ignorance or provincialism.  Visually, I like folk art  for its simplicity and often vibrant hues. Psychologically, I love it because it reminds me of the my mother. She drew with me and my brother when we were young. The subjects in a lot of primitive paintings are also very similar to the anime characters that my daughter and son drew when they were in their teens. Economically,  the price of contemporary and vintage folk art is still very affordable so I can buy to my heart's content without breaking the bank. 

There you have it. I love folk art and proud to admit it.

 

Carpe Diem!

                                   

 

If
Rudyard Kipling (1910) If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating, And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise; If you can dream--and not make dreams your master; If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with triumph and disaster And treat those two imposters just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools; If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”; If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch; If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run-- Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, And--which is more--you’ll be a Man, my son!