Parents rarely let go of their children, so children let go of them. They move away. The moments that used to define them-a mother's approval, a father's nod-are covered by moments of their own accomplishments. It is not until much later that children understand; their stories, and all their accomplishments, sit atop the stories of their mothers and fathers, stones upon stones, beneath the water of their lives.
Mitch Albom, five people you meet in heaven
The excerpt above pretty much encapsulates my thought about your yearning for independence. It is hard for me to let you go. It is painful, as if a part of me is being torn away. I miss you so much when you are away but I understand that this is a part of your individuation. You need to move away in order for you to know and trust yourself. I understand that you need the sense of accomplishment that comes from doing things on your own. I also understand that you still love and need me but on a different level. You still want my guidance but you do not need me to tell you how to live your life. You want to learn how to live by experiencing life. I trust you and I believe in you. I know you will make mistakes along the way but I am confident that you are smart enough to know what is healthy and beneficial for you. I will always be here when you need me. I do not want you to think that I can ever turn my back on you. Do not mistake my silence for not caring. I am merely letting you direct your life without my meddling. I love you and nothing can change that. I support your search of your identity and your pursuit of clarity/definition of your own personal beliefs, values , and morality. I also believe that once your outlook in life is healthier, you will also be physically healthy. Stress can ravage your body. Keeping healthy company and staying away from dramas will make your life less stressful. I was a mess when I was your age because I took care of everybody except myself. I also pushed myself to the limit through sleep deprivation and unhealthy indulgences. I know how it feels to wake up with aching body. There were times when I was not even able to lift the blanket off me. I pitied myself for a while and got angry with the world but that attitude only made me feel worst physically and emotionally. I started getting better when I started listening to my body and stopped being a superfriend. I realized that I needed as much help as I was giving out. I needed to help myself first because when I was a physical and emotional wreck, I was powerless and unable to help anybody. Take care of yourself and you will be healthy enough to take care of others. Love yourself and you will have more love to share. I love you and I miss you so much. I can't wait to give you real hugs and kisses. Mom